An Unexpected Prescription for Adoption Grief

 

How To Grieve Loss

It is extremely difficult for those touched by adoption–whether adoptee, birth parent, or adoptive parent, to keep their balance in the midst of deep grieving and loss. I was surprised to find how Job (of the Bible) handled it. And, he ended up in the latter part of his life being better off than before loss–he was given double blessing.

Dear friends through adoption and foster care,

If you could talk to someone who could tell you how to keep your balance in the midst of grieving adoption loss, would you listen?

Are you desperate enough to listen?

Desperate to listen to God?

If so, what do you think he would prescribe for painful adoption loss?

  • Stiff upper lip?
  • Game of pretend?
  • Happy face?
  • Bite the bullet theology?
  • Attend every adoption convention in the world?

I was relieved to discover that Scripture indicates the opposite.

Instead of the above, God prescribes worship.

I can hear my fellow adoptee friends saying, “You must be kidding, Sherrie. Why would God prescribe worship for painful adoption loss? And, besides, what is worship, anyway?”

Let’s take a closer look at Job and at the same time, see if we can identify with his suffering.

  • Job’s servants were knifed to death
  • Sheep were killed by lightening
  • Camels were stolen
  • All of his children died in a monstrous tornado (he lost his family….sound familiar?)

Job’s pain was unimaginable, just like many of you.

“Yet in the midst of the pain, Joe responded with worship.

Yes…worship….go figure!

How did he worship?

Did he belt out all of four stances of the Great Is Thy Faithfulness hymn ? Did he sing a religious song on his knees? Did he quote Romans 8:28 repetitively?

No…Job did three simple things:

  1. He verbalized his primal pain. “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart.”
  2. He acknowledged blessings as well as the losses.”The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.
  3. He offered a sacrifice of praise: “May the name of the Lord be praised.”

This is how God defines worship.

Surprising, isn’t it?

How about us?

Are we willing to enter into transparent, Job-like worship by verbalizing our primal pain to God? Are we willing to acknowledge the painful losses of adoption along with the blessing? Are we willing to offer a sacrifice of praise and thank a good God that our lives have been sovereignly touched by adoption?

If Job, a blameless and upright man worshipped God in the midst of suffering like this, dare we you any less?

Selah (Think about it).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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